My Love, Forever
by unworthy one
Summary: Loneliness, dispair, and selfishness. Yuki's been hateful and cold lately plunging Shuichi into depression. Will Eiri make amends before it's too late?     suicide attemptlove scene
1. Chapter 1

My Love, Forever

* * *

Shuichi was bouncing around the room in excitement. He couldn't wait for Yuki to finish work. "Come on, Yuki! You promised we

could walk together today! Remember, at the park?" Yuki didn't budge. "Yuuuuuki!" "SHUT UP!" the agrivated man yelled. "If you

wanna walk, take your girlfriend Hiroshi ya damn brat!" "Fine..." Shuichi walked out sadly. At the park... "Hiro! Yuki's being so cold

lately." Shuichi sat on a bench with his best friend. "Maybe he hates you now?" Tears started flowing down like a firehose.

* * *

"WAAAAH! No! What did I doooo?!" Hiro patted his friend's back. "Kidding. But you should confront him about it, k'?" Shuichi

stared out through the park. "Lately he's been so... faraway." Hiro sneezed. "It's getting cold, fearless leader. Let's go home." "I think

it's gonna snow." said Shu as he stood up.

* * *

Shuichi hugged his frail body to keep warmth from escaping. "I hate winter! It's too cold!" 'So is Yuki.' Tonight Shu got the couch.

Earlier him and his lover had a fight over the stupidest thing. Shuichi wanted the heater on. But Yuki said no. Then they both had a two

hour fight. Eiri seemed to become further and further away. The two never talked. Not even in bed. The man was more bitter than

usual. Sex didn't change his mood either. That made Shuichi more and more depressed as the days wore on. One day the boy took a

bold approach. "Yuki..." The man actually turned around. "What?" "D-do you love me?" Eiri saw how his lover's eyes were glazed

with lonliness. "..." "Please answer me!" Shuichi was desperate. "..." He walked out of the room, tearful.

* * *

'Have I really been that cold?' Yuki dismissed the thought and returned to work.

* * *

Shuichi got dressed in the bathroom, not wanting to face the man he loves. All he could dig out was a pair of small shorts, shirt, and

mini jacket. He then left quietly for work.

"La li ho!" the rockstar shouted. Everyone looked up and greeted, "Ohayo gozaimasu." "I've gotta new song I've been work on." The

team set up the recording studio. But as soon as Shu touched the microphone, he was pushed from behind and landed on his ass.

"Shuichi! Ryu-chan is here!" Ryuichi wore his favorite Kumagoro suit. "Come on! Touma won't play with me, so lets play tag.

Kumagoro wants to play too!" he whined cutely. "Gomen, Sakuma-san. I've got rehearsal." "Aw, I wanna play with Shu-chan!" the

man started to cry loudly and suck on Kumagoro. "I'll play as soon as I'm finished. Okay Sakuma-san?" Ryuichi grinned. "Yay! I'll be

outside with Kumagoro-nanoda!" The 31-year-old man then happily skipped out of room. Shuichi sighed in relief and started

rehearsal.

BPR and Pink (from "Immortal Verses" by Suzanne Starr published by our happiness flies. Our crystal love shines pleasantly. Not even death can penitrate. The twilight moon reaches to us as our slowed dance spins. The white stars welcome us with glee. As our feet soar above them. Beams from our shining love reflect stabbing darkness. Blue shapes her beauty, Purple shapes her life, Red shapes her smile. But as we both know, Pink shapes our love. The stars reach out. They whisper to our hearts. We giggle honestly. They ask us our wish. We answer, "Nothing." The stars gap in disbelief. I say, "Blue shapes her beauty, Purple shapes her life, Red shapes her smile. But as we both know, Pink shapes her love."

Shuichi took a deep breathe as the song ended. K pointed his shiny .44 magnum at the strawberry-head and yelled, "Break time!"

* * *

Shuichi walked to front of NG Productions looking for Ryuichi. A large gust of freezing air hit him as soon as he opened the front door.

"Kuso, it's cold! How can he stand to be out here?" "Poor Shu-chan! You should have been prepared for the weather-nanoda!"

Ryuichi laughed as he pounced on the freezing strawberry. The two squabbled all over the ground bringing attention to themselves.

"Now lets play hide-and-seek tag!" Ryuichi sprang up and started counting. Shuichi sped off inside the building and frantically looked

for a place to hide. An elevator caught his eye and he ran for it. "Crap!" It had a sign that read "Out of Order" in the front. Shuichi

turned to the stairs and sprinted up the eight floors. By the time he made it to the top Shuichi was exhausted and his legs felt like jelly.

Sweat dripped off his nose as he bent over to catch his breath. A second later he could hear Ryuichi sing-"Shu-chaaaaan, where are

yoooou?" "Gotta hide, gotta hide..." he muttered while finding a hiding spot. "There!" The pink-headed rockstar pointed to a vent that

was easily opened. Shuichi jumped inside right before Ryuichi poked his head from inside NG. "Shu-chan?"

* * *

Shuichi miscalculated how long the drop was. It felt like a bottomless hole. When he finally reached the end... "BASH!" His whole

body crashed onto the bottom. The impact knocked Shuichi out for awhile.

* * *

Hiro, K, Sakano, and Suguru looked up when they heard a loud crash from above. "What was that?" Fujisaki asked. "I dunno." Hiro

was about to get up when Ryuichi raced through the door. "Has anyone seen Shuichi?" They suspended the crash as the five thought of

where their vocalist went.

* * *

Shuichi woke up aching. His whole body hurt from the fall. As soon as he got himself under control, the singer sat up. But he forgot

about the close quarters and clobbered his head against the vent. "Owwwwww..." Shuichi moaned. He just then noticed how the

screws were popping one-by-one . "Oh shi-" Shuichi was cut off midsentence and screamed as he was falling(once again) through.

* * *

The gang was searching for their beloved strawberry-head, but he was nowhere to be found. They checked every corner of the

company with no prevail. The team soon gave up and waited in the recording room. "Break ended over a half an hour ago!" Fujisaki

complained. Hiro turned to Ryuichi. "You've been here for about ten years, is there anywhere els?" The man thought for a moment.

"Iie, Shu-chan's better at hide-and-seek than Kumagoro-nanoda!" K made a grave face. "I think we're looking at kidnap, folks." He

pulled out a walkie-talkie and said-"Kidnap. Shuichi Shindou. Shoot to kill-" "KILL?!" "Oh...x that. Rescue." When K put the walkie-

talkie away, everyone jumped as they heard a scream. "AAAAAAAAAH!" BASH! SLAM! A pink blur crashed through the vent and

landed on Sakano with swirly eyes. Ryuichi jumped up and poked the unconscious boy singing-"Found you Shu-chan!" Hiro moved

the singer off of the poor man. "We can't rehearse, he's out cold." K pulled out his magnum and fired it at the ceiling. Shuichi jumped in

to consciousness and fell over. "Nani?! How'd I get here?" The five all pointed at the ceiling. "Oh..." After a quick explaination of how

he landed, Ryuichi begged to play again. "Come on, Shu-chaaan!" "Gomen Sakuma-san. I have to finish work. And doesn't Seguchi-

san need you?" "Ara! I forgot! Bie bie Shu-chan!" Shuichi waved before grabbing the microphone. Suguru tuned his keyboard and

Hiro held his guitar at ready.

* * *

"Kami I can't take this freezing temperature!" Muttered the pink-headed boy as he hugged himself. "Why didn't I wear the right

clothes?" 'Oh yeah. The argument...' Shuichi walked by a store selling hot treats and American baked goods and drooled. He bought a

small bag for himself and a large bag for Yuki. "Yuki's gotta be cold. He never turned on the heater." Back on his way home, Shuichi

stuffed his treats into his bag and held Yuki's by his chest to keep them warm. Shuichi walked into the apartment and shouted, "Yuki!

Tadaima!" 'Not even an iterasshai...' His lover seemed to be asleep so he placed the food on the counter with a note and changed for

bed. Shuichi thought that he'd disturb Yuki, so instead he laid himself on the couch.

* * *

Later Shuichi awoke from the sound of rustling. He found Yuki pacing around the room. "Yuki?" The man gave him a look full of anger

and hate. "I missed you today. Alot happened too. In fact I-" "Shut up." Shuichi was taken aback by the demand. "Yuki...What's

wrong? Wakalimassen! Please, I'll do anything to make you hap-" "I said SHUT UP!" Tears welled up into his eyes. Shuichi ran and

hugged his lover tightly, tears flowing down his face. "Y-yuki, I love yo-!" Suddenly the man shoved Shuichi into the wall. "Don't touch

me!" he yelled. Shuichi slumped, crying. "Why won't you accept me?" he sobbed. The boy curled up in a ball, shaking violently. "Why

a-are you so c-cold?" Rooted to the spot, Eiri couldn't believe what he just did. Yuki silently trudged to his room leaving his lover

sprawled on the floor.

* * *

Shuichi woke up with a sticky face. He cried himself to sleep last night by the wall he was thrown to. Shuichi

quickly grabbed his clothes and walked to work. The vocalist couldn't compose a single lyric today. The sadness and lonliness in his

heart weighed him down. His friends pryed to find the meaning of his behavior. But Shuichi kept his depression to himself. "Does this

have to do with Yuki?" Hiroshi asked sternly. "..." "I'll find out sooner or later." Sakano cried, yelled, and cried some more to get

Shuichi to write lyrics. K pressured him by pointing a gun at his head. Fujisaki threaghtened to quit the band.(no-one complained)

After awhile Shuichi gave in and started writing.

"My Love-Letter to NoOne" by Suzanne Starr.

CONFESSION. PREDILECTION. I watched from above as you said those words.(UNDENIABLE) That trust faltered as you broke my barrier. Your eyes glistened in sorrow as something shattered.(REACTION) I cry blood. You're hurt. "No!" I scream. I hear my heart cracking from the pressure.(DEFIANCE) Hate me, love me. Kill me, kiss me. Those terrible memories haunt me.(DEPRESSION) Some call it "misfortune", well I call it "hell". My cracking heart finally shattered. I scrape my fingered puzzling the fragments.(HOPELESS) The remains look beautiful dowsed in my blood. I can't stop it. The shattered pieces are still radiant with love.(SHINE) And so my letter is to no-one as I stand out in the rain. Tears mixed in the droplets. I whisper.(LOVE)

Everyone read the lyrics and stared at Shuichi as he rushed out the door. Shuichi ran all the way home, afraid that his friends would

follow. A sob escaped his lips. Inside he slammed the door and bent over gasping for air. Then the boy sank to the floor, crying softly.

Shuichi didn't get up for a few hours. He cried now that his friends know now the reason of his depression. Yuki heard the front door

slam and something slide down it. He ignored it and returned to work. A few hours later the man was hungry and started walking to

the kitchen. On the way he spotted something pink on the ground. 'Shuichi...' He was curled up and shaking as though crying. 'It's been

three hours.' The novelist discontinued his travel to the kitchen and returned to his study.

* * *

Shuichi didn't return to work for four days. But that didn't stop him from composing lyrics. Each more morbid than the last. He shut

himself in the bathroom all day only comming out for Yuki's use. Every night harsh arguments were exchanged. Shuichi would always

break down in tears. Depression and lonliness quickly changed his personality. So as to Yuki who became bitter and hateful. Shuichi

also started neglecting his body at the same rate as his changing personality. Being always in a foul mood from lack of fluids and

nutrition. He always kept his depressing lyrics in a folder under the couch. On the fourth night...

* * *

"Yuki. I'm tired of this." "So am I." "I can't take this anymore." "So move out." "I love you!" Yuki's menacing eyes stabbed right

through his heart. "Wakali...mas." Shuichi whispered. "You loathe me. Disliking everything about me. Including my soul." "Bulls-eye."

The vocalist turned. "You don't accept me, right? Unneccesary to your life." He opened the door. "I'll leave now." "Finally." "Sayonara,

Eiri Yuki..."

* * *

Shuichi ran out into the cold, wet streets. His heart thudded against his chest as he sprinted away from his love. Finally he reached the

park. Finding a good tree he collapsed under it from exhaustion. Shuichi couldn't take it anymore. His lover dispised him. The pink-

headed boy once more cried himself to sleep.

* * *

Yuki just stood there after the kid fled. He felt neither sympathy nor remorse. After closing the door the novelist returned to typing.

The day after... Yuki rubbed his forehead. "That damn brat's still not back. It's like he's haunting me or something." He glanced outside

and saw snow falling. The clock read 8'o clock at night. Suddenly the phone rang. Yuki slowly stood up and answered. "Hey, it's Hiro.

Shuichi hasn't been to work all week. How is he?" He was half expecting the brat to be on the other side and was shocked that he

hasn't shown up at work since their last fight. The band meant more than anything to the vocalist, right? "The brat ran away a day 'n a

half ago." "Don't tell me he...?!" Hiro panicked. "The weather's been terrible lately! C'mon, we've gotta find him!" Yuki sighed angrily.

"Go ahead by yourself. I don't care." The guitarist felt like he was slapped in the face. "What do you mean-" "I said, I DON'T CARE!

He's such a stupid damn brat. I couldn't care less what happens." Hiro was pissed. "Now I see what's happened. You've been so cold

to him all week that he's gone beyond depressed! He loves you and you selfishly took advantage of that love!" he roared. His voice

suddenly became low. "I said once that if you give Shuichi a reason to cry other than from his naive stupidity, I'd never forgive you.

Now it's beyond that." Yuki sat there for a moment. "The park." "Huh?" Hiro was taken aback. "The brat always hangs out at the

park." The two both slammed down their phones and jumped into the nearest vehicle.

END OF CH1

* * *

I hope you like it, that's my first Gravitation fanfic. Oh, and it's based on the manga. The reason Sakano was there

was that Fujisaki couldn't get Shu to write.(since Sakano is Ryuichi's manager)

Later I'll post translations. -dja!


	2. announcement

Hey guys! I want to tell you that I will NOT stop this fanfic. Why? Because the whole thing is

already written down. The problem? Typing it onto my computer. I wrote this fanfic 7 months

ago when I didn't have internet. It was written on 1ft long sheets of paper and consists of 50

pages. The thing in my way is TIME. I can never find time to type!ToT So I just wanna tell you

that I won't be quitting but hopefully be put down soon.(I'm so sorry if you've been waiting so long!)

unworthy one


	3. Chapter 3, tragic

**My Love, Forever CH 2**

**Me**:

_I finally have time. In these couple of days I will try my hardest to get the next couple of chapters done. I'm sooooooo sorry that it took so long. ToT_

* * *

"Yuki..." Shuichi laid under a tree for two whole days. It rained on the first day, stripping him of warmth. "W-why?" Tears mixed with the rain as he sobbed. His cute features were diminished by dispair and lack of nutrients. His strawberry hair sopping wet and bangs stuck to his forehead. Two hours later the rain faded but was replaced with snow that lasted much longer. He couldn't move at all, blinded and blushed with fever.

Yuki and Hiro met up as they dashed around the park. "Please, let him be alive..." the blonde whispered to kami. Snow was everywhere making the sidewalk slippery as the two turned the corner and they slipped. "Kuso!" Yuki cursed under his breath before getting up. The man noticed something in the corner of his eye and froze. "Shu...ichi." Hiro turned around and stared in shock at the horrific sight. There lie the boy, unconsious and still. His cheeks were red and lips blue. Wet clothes reveal neglect and wet hair stuck to his scalp like glue. Hiro ran to his fallen friend's side and Yuki fell to his knees. "I did this...?" "Hurry he's got hypothermia! Eiri-san, help me lift Shuichi!" The man came to his senses and ran to aid his lover. "His breathing is labored and shallow..." Eiri removed his jacket and covered Shuichi silently. "Call an ambulance." "No!" Hiro argued. "It'll never get here in time!" "Then hurry your ass to my house!" Yuki lifted the sickly light boy into his arms and hurried to his car. He turned up the heat as high as possible and sped home.

* * *

While rushing Shuichi into the house the boy whispered his name. Hiro came in from behind and ordered him to fetch hot water, rags, and blankets. Yuki threw open the sheets, tucked Shuichi in, and flicked on the heater. While Yuki applied the wet towl muttered, "I'm such a moron." Hiro watched his best friend's chest rise and fall harshly. "I'll call everyone." The brunett left the room. Yuki stared at Shuichi's face. His fever reddened his face and where lacked it was pale. "Don't die on me." The man stroked his lover's strawberry hair all the way to his chin. An hour later Hiro came back and held his friend's hand.

* * *

Shuichi couldn't move. The pain he was feeling was just unbearable. "I don't know how much longer I can take this." he thought miserably. A soothing voice could be heard and he strained to hear. "Don't die on me." Yuki. Shuichi used up all of his strength and fell into a deep slumber along with his lover and best friend.

Later Yuki was woken up by the ring of the doorbell. And in came Seguchi, K, Fujisaki, Ryuichi, and Sakano. "Where is Shuichi?" Ryuichi demanded. "The bedroom." Everyone demanded an explanation. Yuki made it short-"I made him suffer by sleeping outside for two days." All the visitors save Ryuichi left the house that night. The sapphire-eyed man watched Shuichi's still form. "What happened, exactly?" he demanded. Yuki turned and saw that the eyes of his lover's idol were brimming with anger. "You are hard to understand, Sakuma Ryuichi." Eiri then told the horrible events that bestowed his lover.

* * *

Shuichi slowely returned to consciousness. His mind was groggy from the effects of fever. Though he finally gathered enough strength to lift his eyes. With fuzzy vision he made out Yuki, Hiro, and Sakuma-san. "Uhn..." Shuichi moaned. It took every ounce of willpower he had to sit up. Hiro felt the movement and woke up. The two stared and gapped at eachother.

"S-shuichi...you're alive?!" "Yeah..." Suddenly Shuichi leaned over in pain and fell back unconscious. "Shuichi!" Hiro shouted worriedly. "Wuh?" Eiri asked sleepily. "We gotta check him! Shu woke up and fainted!" Yuki took Shuichi's temperature as Hiro and Ryuichi pulled off the singer's clothes. "His fever went up by two degrees." Hiro gave no response. "Hiro, I said-" Yuki turned and was cut off by the sight before him. "Shuichi!" Ryuichi shouted. "Oh my God." Shuichi's body was as thin as death. "Everyone..." Hiro whispered. "Find an apron."

* * *

I'm working on the next chapter as I speak!-dja matte!


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